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Facebook and the Ghosts of Conversations

An old friend (although we never talk these days) posted a Facebook status regarding an anniversary with his wife.

I still have details from the conversations around when they met, and the months following—she's cute, she's convenient but he's not sure he's ready for "just convenient", she apologizes as a response to any imperfect situation regardless of fault or involvement, she wants 3 kids by 30 and he is certain he wants none, did Jay ever make demands on who I hung out with (overtly or not) and did I ever do the same to Jay, he's not sure he can handle her former eating disorder, he's having issues with her family and so is she, he doesn't like how she treats his sister, he wants to take her away from this state but she claims she'll never leave it...

It is awkward to remember these conversations—he stopped hanging out with me because she was jealous.

I know these things, and she'll never know that I know them. It is extremely unsettling.

Avatar fraz
07-23-11 18:01
That's certainly uncomfortable... But honestly, who doesn't start any relationship with at least a few reservations?

A former girlfriend told me that when we started dating, her mother told her that dating was basically a try-out for marriage. It was wildly freaky at the time, but now thinking about it, she was dead on! The only thing shitty about your friend's situation is that in our new culture of over-sharing, basically everything is a matter of basic record.

At least in my opinion, love isn't discovered, it grows. I say you cut him some slack.
Avatar effika
07-23-11 18:24
Prodigal Elowel User
Oh, I hold no feelings of ill will toward my friend, it was just very odd to see him talk about his relationship and realize I knew a lot about how it started that his wife doesn't know that I know.
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